Osan Golf Course Bottled Water – served in an environmentally-friendly white envelope filled with "green"

CCK Bottled Water – this is not deemed "ordinary water"

CH2M-Hill Bottled Water – your husband is paid good money to drink it so your friends should buy a billion and a half dollars of it

2002 Schoolgirl Incident Bottled Water – goes down easy, have a whole tank

Your Juicy Girlfriend Bottled Water – half the guys in your division had it when you were in the field

Your Juicy Girlfriend's Baby Bottled Water – it's probably not yours but you can pay for it anyway

ATEK Bottled Water – we will be having a press conference this evening to address issues of fringe groups speaking badly about our bottled water and to announce what legal actions we will be taking over this

Good Neighbor Bottled Water – slimy yet smooth; a perfect drink to accompany golfing, dining or shopping; and, now, with a new double-your-money cashback rebate offer* *offer generally only valid to higher-ranking servicemembers

Contractor Bottled Water – expensive and been around a long, long time

Stars & Stripes Bottled Water – Captain Dillweed stated that soldiers at U.S. Army Garrison-Yongsan gave benjo ditch water high marks and not only preferred it over bottled water but were eagerly waiting for another mandatory Saturday morning water tasting

USFK Bottled Water – often dirty, never transparent, filled with drips and leaves a bitter taste in your mouth

Don't Ask, Don't Tell Bottled Water – 'cause with all the restrictions on women, drugs, smoking and alcohol, suckin' peter is one of the few things left that nobody comes lookin' for

Fraud, Waste and Abuse Bottled Water – no matter where we put it in the store, nobody seems to notice it

EOC Training Bottled Water – available only in 6-packs of clear, yellow, brown, black, estrogen and cripple

Han River Downstream From Yongsan Bottled Water – now with .000000002% more formaldehyde

Commissary Bottled Water – now in ox tail flavor, while supplies last, if they even make it to the shelves

Queen For a Year Bottled Water – it might be nasty and sour but what choice do you really have?

P&HT Bottled Water – $300 water so good you have to keep it locked up at night – USFK Approved!

Juicy Bar Bottled Water – the taste of the tap hastily refilling an old water bottle from the trash for the low, low price of only $3

Songtan Sally Bottled Water – c'mon, let's drink

2ID Bottled Water – now with convenient string for easy carrying

Dude, we have places in Canada that have been untouched by humans for thousands of years. Heck, some of our ice is 20 000 years old.

Speaking of which:

http://www.canada.com/ottawacitizen/news/story.ht…